Data Deleted!
Congratulations! Your data has been successfully deleted. You are now completely off the grid.
We have removed every single piece of information we had on you. It is gone forever.
You no longer exist in our system.
Deletion Summary
- Records deleted: 0
- Backups deleted: 0
- Dave's laptop: untouched (he's still in Cancun)
- Kevin's phone: he says he deleted it (he didn't)
- Floppy disk: cracked (RIP)
- Data sold before deletion: yes
- New data collected during this process: 247 additional data points
- Buyers notified of your deletion request: yes (they laughed)
- Iowa weather updated: partly cloudy
- Pigeons recovered: 1 of 2
- Sponge status: decomposed
- Kevin's dramatic reading: available on podcast
- Time spent on this process: too much
- Worth it: absolutely not
Thank you for using our data deletion service. As a token of our appreciation, we have
signed you up for our newsletter, our partner newsletters, Dave's travel blog,
Kevin's dramatic reading podcast, and a monthly sponge subscription box.
Have a great day!